Recently I’ve realized that my voice has been stifled since I was a child. Growing up we are told children should be seen and not heard. Don’t talk back. Over time, I have been brainwashed to think the way that those who have held authoritarian positions over me have wanted to me think. What does that mean for my artistic vision?
I’m not going to get into a nature vs nurture debate here. All of it carries equal weight in my mind. What I do mean to do is explore the portions of my mind and creativity that have been impacted by others negatively. As a young child, adults change your thought patterns even if they don’t know it. As an adult, it is important to undo the mistakes that have resonated so far.
So what am I talking about? I’m saying that throughout all my childhood, I wanted to be a painter. Art captivated my mind and I practiced constantly. Teachers didn’t have much time for any of that. What they were preaching came second hand to me, so I was bored. Boredom made me act out. The powers that be slowly, but most definitely surely, redirected my attention from what was interesting to me to what was necessary for them.
Reprogramming a fully functioning brain takes work. In my case, I need to refocus my energy pattern that flows through my brain to enable me to envision and pursue art. Since my brainwaves have been set on a course through math books, sitting still, and shutting up, they need to be taught to travel through the ravine that sparked the fire of childhood ambition.
Technical knowledge is important to get out the vision you have in your mind. If you don’t know how to paint, it doesn’t matter if you can imagine a painting. I have to work backwards to undo what had had originally been done. Reject the traditional ideas about what makes good art, what is the social norm of acceptability, and what everyone else wants to see from you. Un-teach yourself the cookie cutter lessons that subdued your passionate pursuit of unique. None of it matters now. Allow your artistry to be untethered. Follow @MattExists